Quiet your inner critic
“Your inner critic is simply a part of you that needs more self-love.”
― Amy Leigh Mercree, The Compassion Revolution: 30 Days of Living from the Heart
Are you listening to your inner voice? Is it saying nice things? It’s all fine and dandy when the inner voice is boosting your self esteem and giving you more confidence. But what happens when that voice starts expressing criticism, frustration or disapproval? That is the voice we need to learn how to quiet. That is the often stronger inner voice. Your inner critic.
Sometimes, this inner voice can be very useful when the criticism is constructive, like in situations where we are capable of doing more and will feel great about the results. This could be a big work project or an important conversation with someone we care about. It’s when the voice becomes harsh and is no longer constructive that we should address it.
When the critical voice is heard too often and becomes almost normal, people can start to find themselves feeling depressed or anxious. Their inner critic is impacting their mood.
Nelda Andersone, Ph.D said in many mental health illnesses, self-criticism is considered to be among the most common and destructive stressors linked to them, including depression, PTSD and eating disorders.
So, how do we begin to change the severity and frequency of this voice?
It’s a bit of a process and one that requires us all to be very mindful of what we say to ourselves and when we say it.
Here are five ways to quiet that inner critic:
Become aware of your thoughts
Next time a negative thought comes in, ask yourself: what are you telling yourself? How does it make you feel? Would you speak this way to someone you love?
Redirect your attention
As soon as you recognize the critic is there, get distracted. Take some breaths, sing a song (even in your head), start a conversation with someone.This will give your brain a break from the negative thoughts, even for a short time.
Talk back
Remind yourself, these are just thoughts and you can take some control of them and let them go.
Reframe the internal conversation
This one is obvious, but try to replace the negative thoughts with something positive. Even something as simple as you liking your shirt, or remembering you’re a great friend.
See a counsellor
Mental health professionals are a trusted resource for helping you discover tools and techniques when you find your inner voice is winning out. They’ll help you understand your thought processes and help you find your way to growth and positive change.